"I Don't Speak Cuntonese" - Mouse Mat
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Delivery and Shipping Info
Delivery and Shipping Info
- Fast dispatch: Order before 1pm (Mon–Fri) for same-day shipping — all other orders will be dispatched within 1 working day
- Free UK delivery: Arrives in 3–5 working days
- Need it in a hurry? Tracked 24 and Tracked 48 delivery upgrades available at checkout
- Discreet packaging: Safe for work, house shares, or even your nan’s
- Send straight to the recipient: No receipts or prices included in the parcel (learn more)
- More delivery info: International shipping, times & options (learn more)
Got a question? Need help?
Got a question? Need help?
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Buy 2, get 1 free on EVERYTHING across the site.
Just add ANY 3 items to your basket — the cheapest one will be FREE at checkout.
Yes, if you add 6 items, you’ll get 2 FREE!
You then have a choice of standard FREE UK DELIVERY (3–5 days) or upgrade to tracked/express with SMS and email updates (1–2 days).
"I Don't Speak Cuntonese" - Mouse Mat
Description
Description
Our “I Don’t Speak Cuntonese” mouse mat is a straight-talking desk accessory for someone who’s done with bullshit and ready to get a laugh.
This one works surprisingly well in (some) offices — just maybe not HR!
- 3 FOR 2 across the whole site (info)
- FREE UK DELIVERY as standard, with speedy upgrades available (info)
- Dispatched within one working day
- Soft, smooth top for comfortable scrolling
- Grippy non-slip rubber base
- 22cm x 18cm mouse pad
- Cellophane-wrapped with card backing
- Handmade at our Sussex workshop
The full Cuntonese collection includes a mug, keyring, badge and teddy to match this mat.
Or browse the entire Cunt Mouse Mat collection to find your perfect rude gift.
Payment & Security
Payment methods
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