ORDER BEFORE 1pm (Mon-Fri) FOR SAME DAY DISPATCH

FREE STANDARD UK DELIVERY ON ALL ORDERS (EXPRESS OPTIONS AVAILABLE)

"If My Humour Offends You" - Mouse Mat

£8.95
FREE UK DELIVERY ✓ 3 FOR 2 MIX & MATCH ✓ (LEARN MORE)

Delivery and Shipping Info

  • Fast dispatch: Order before 1pm (Mon–Fri) for same-day shipping — all other orders will be dispatched within 1 working day
  • Free UK delivery: Arrives in 3–5 working days
  • Need it in a hurry? Tracked 24 and Tracked 48 delivery upgrades available at checkout
  • Discreet packaging: Safe for work, house shares, or even your nan’s
  • Send straight to the recipient: No receipts or prices included in the parcel (learn more)
  • More delivery info: International shipping, times & options (learn more)

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Description

For the unapologetically cheeky. This mouse mat is a punchy, passive-aggressive gem that’s guaranteed to raise eyebrows (and probably middle fingers too).

Reads: “If my humour offends you: 1. I am really very sorry. 2. I will tone it down. 3. 1 & 2 are lies. 4. You’re a cunt.”

  • 3 FOR 2 on everything (details)
  • FREE UK DELIVERY – standard on all orders (info)
  • Dispatched within one working day
  • Soft-touch top with grippy rubber base
  • Mouse pad measures 22cm x 18cm
  • Cellophane wrapped with backing card
  • Printed at our Sussex workshop in the UK

Also available as a mug, keyring, card, and badge. View the full “If My Humour Offends You” collection or browse the complete mouse mat range.

Payment & Security

Payment methods

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  • Diners Club
  • Discover
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  • Mastercard
  • PayPal
  • Union Pay
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